woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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