the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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