All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
