he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
