I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
