Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
sex in a hospital.. check
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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