rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
