Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
