So drunk, too bad you don't want this
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Randomize
