Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
