I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
