I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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