i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
