Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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