with your own penis?
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
The chlamydia really affected his face.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
