so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
