so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize
