In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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