at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i love accidental penises.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
