This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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