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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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