i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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