His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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