yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
