Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
