I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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