That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
