I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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