If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
