remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
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It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
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