my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Randomize
