his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Randomize