Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
false alarm, still single
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
