I need help removing her.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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