I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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