Can Purell be used as lube?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize