Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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