at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
