every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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