Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
