Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Randomize
