Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
