i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
