and she was petting her beer can
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
