So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
