Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
