you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Randomize
