The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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