And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
