is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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